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Blog for Self Improvement and Personality Development

Self improvement advice, personal growth and self-help tips.

Self-Improvement: Coax your Dreams into Reality with a Single Spark of Core Desire

Ever since we are a little kid in school and witnessed the world outside of our homes, our little minds are already working up plans. Indeed, even small children are capable of thinking up plans for their life. In their own childish worlds, they already have a burning desire to do something.

They may not yet fully grasp every plan and dream they wish to attain. Still, it boosts their self-image. Their self-esteem may also be elevated much with these dreams, giving them the courage to confront a school bully.

As the years go by, children become adolescents and then, adults. Every stage of their life is, like a little child, still full of plans and dreams. Others may have fulfilled theirs while others are still seeking of ways to achieve theirs.

Meanwhile, there are also people who seem to have their head full of desires and ambitions but remain just that. What do we make of these people? Are you one of them?

Do not lose heart or your self-image and self-esteem if ever you are one of those that cannot seem to find a way to strike the match and brighten their way into fulfilling their dreams. You might just be following the wrong dream. Or have not tapped the full wealth of your hidden potential.

Indeed, every one of us has quite an extensive hidden potential growing and developing throughout the years. Once we know of this, next thing we have to do is learn to identify and direct our hidden potential. You might discover that you are born to be a ballerina. Or that you are gifted with a talent of acting, singing or leading people. Your dream may also involve traveling the world and meeting famous and legendary personages.

However, without proper, prompt and persistent guidance and learning you cannot develop the power of motivating yourself strongly towards your dream. Motivation is the key to all self-improvement. Maybe we know exactly what we want, and the plans we have drawn for ourselves are realistic enough. Without that elemental force that drives us to strive and increase the light of our humbly lit, wish candles.

Persistence and proper action is the answer will unleash power of man to motivate him/her self. Everything we wanted out of life ever since we are little is achieved because of this powerful and vast motivation to oneself. Everything we wanted and failed to achieve are the result of the lack of proper motivation.

We may have improved, but our full-blown self-improvement is still wanting.

Do not be mistaken, though about this. If you seem lost in the silken web of dreams you spun, do not think you are not motivated. There is no person born without motivation. You just lack the proper learning and training on how to force out your specific desires, cultivate a powerful yearning, and drive to attain them. You might also lack self-esteem and your self-image is way down below.

Motivation is something we are born with. That spark in you can develop into a raging fire of determination. Just think, if other people would motivate you to achieve a certain dream, it would not have that lasting effect because other people are also touch-and-go in our lives. The motivation they can offer is limited.

Meanwhile, if you discover that faint spark in you and feed it continuously, it will spread out and consume all of you. Then and only then can you have the lasting power to get what you want out of life.

The faint spark is your core desires. They are your dreams, hopes and wishes, whipped into shape as you grow older and learn more. If we stunted our growth as a person and lost enough self-esteem, that faint spark may die and our desires may never develop into reality. If we continue feeding it by uplifting our level of awareness, self-improvement and self-image, then they are just there around the corner.

Knowing your core desires is both easy but quite complicated to do. Make a list of everything you really liked to do from the time you were a kid and until today. This list is yours alone. Do not muddle it up with what others are egging you on to or coaching you to answer. Be honest with yourself and the list you will draw up once finished will bring you full force motivation.

Take down everything you knew and learned that you really like to have. Avoid listing things that would be nice to have or do. Be brutally honest with yourself.

Do not make a mental list, write it down and you will see the difference. Once you have the list, then start figuring out ways and clear out the path into getting the core desires you want.

It will be a measure of your self-improvement once you never let go of your core desires. Your self-esteem and self-image will sustain your unwavering motivation. Let the fire of motivation keep burning in you!

Mary Murtha has BLS and M. Div degrees majoring in biblical studies and ethics. For more info about Self Image and Self Improvement Tips visit Best Self Improvement Info


How To Develop True Self Worth and Really Win

In order to feel good about themselves, most compare themselves to others, compete and try to win in all areas of their life. They do not realize, however, that this often can be an expression of aggression towards others, and ultimately also towards themselves.

When we want to be better than others, we are also driven to make sure they remain beneath us. We do what we can to keep them in their place, and look for their failings and weaknesses. We may also take pleasure in their hardships and losses. When famous people fall from their pedestal and suffer, many feel relief that they are not so much better after all.

How We Compare Ourselves To Others

Some are not able to relate at all to others who they feel are "better than them. They fill their worlds with those who they feel are inferior, (and treat them that way, to keep them in their place.)  Some are drawn to those who they think are better than them, and spend a lot of time trying to tear the person down. Others become members of sports team and take great relish in beating the others, proving that they are "best".

Living this way, one becomes unable to see the beauty and gifts which each person has and which they could otherwise share with you. This keeps you on edge, looking for ways you can maintain your superiority. Relationships become power struggles. There is little fulfillment, or true sense of self worth.

Pride Vs. Self Worth

Pride creates a grandiose, false sense of self and causes the person to close themselves off to many situations, possibilities, insights and relationships. Pride also causes them to be out of touch with true self worth, who they truly are, what really brings happiness.

A true sense of self worth, on the other hand, provides enjoyment when dealing with all kinds of individuals. With true self worth you do not need to compare yourself to others, tear them apart or feel superior. Instead, you are able to value who they are and share you both of your gifts.  As Emerson wisely said, a rose in the garden does not compare itself with another. It just blooms as it is intended to.

Exercise 

Step 1: Recognizing The Many Faces Of Pride:   Make a list of those you feel better than. Who are they? Why are you better than them? A) Make a list of those you feel are better than you. Who are they? How does this make you feel? How do you behave with them? This exercise will surprise you. Be honest with yourself. You may also be astonished to see how many people you've written out of your life.

Step 2: Stop Comparing

A) Pick someone on your list that you feel better than. Write down all their positive qualities. Now, stop

comparing yourself to this person. Let them be who they are. Let you be who you are, as well. Enjoy the differences between you.

B) Do the same with someone you think is better than you. Can you allow both of you to have positive qualities though they may be different? Can you stop comparing in this case as well?

Step 3: A New Meeting

A) Contact the person you feel better than and go out with them to lunch. Make the meeting all about them. Don't talk much. Really find out about them. Give them a chance to be the star. Do the same with someone who feels they are better than you. You'll be amazed to discover how much others crave being heard and known, how shaky they are about who they are. As you do this you'll see that you don't have to tear others down to feel good about yourself.

Step 4: Each One Is The Best One

As soon as you notice yourself feeling better than another, let it go and let them be the star.  Realize that both of you can be wonderful. As soon as you notice that you feel someone else is better than you, do the same. Look for their good qualities and yours as well. Find out more about them. Talk to them about themselves and really listen. Letm the true person they are emerge. Don't buy into a fantasy. It won't do you any good.

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Learn to resolve conflict easily and build supportive relationships in award winning The Anger Diet, (30 Days to Stress Free Living)http://www.theangerdiet.com . Top psychologist,Founder of Everyone Wins Mediation, has helped thousands.Free ezine, articles http://www.newyorkmediates.com  topspeaker@yahoo.com, (212)

288-0028. http://www.newyorkmediates.com


Learning How To Overcome Self-sabotage

It's easy to forget just how powerful our subconscious minds can be. We are often completely unaware of how our actions (or inactions) are affecting our lives. We may complain that things never work out for us, we have bad luck, or we just don't have what it takes to be successful. What we fail to realize is that we are actually creating our own circumstances through subconscious self-sabotage. In order to overcome self-sabotage we first have to use conscious awareness to explore our emotions and fears, and understand how they influence our actions. Once we have determined the cause of the destructive behavior, we can then take steps to prevent it from happening in the future.

What's really happening when we sabotage ourselves? Subconsciously, we may be frightened by a particular outcome, even though we say we want it. Take, for example, losing weight. Many overweight people have struggled for years, tried diet after diet, and still can't lose the weight (or keep it off). They berate themselves, push themselves harder, and try to force the weight off. But what's happening beneath the surface? Do they really want to lose their excess pounds? They may say they do, but what if their layers of fat are providing a sense of protection and security in an uncertain world? What if they feel the need to cover up and conceal themselves? Losing weight then becomes a threatening, frightening possibility. So they might sabotage their diet efforts in order to avoid feeling too vulnerable and exposed. Even though they say they want to lose weight (and even believe they do) they still might set themselves up for failure by sneaking food, skipping exercise, and then making a promise that they'll try harder tomorrow.

Others may be intimidated by something as simple as starting a new job. Did you know that there are a surprisingly high number of people who don’t show up for job interviews, even for highly-desirable positions? Let's look at another example: Perhaps a stay-at-home-mom decides she needs to return to the workforce to earn money for her family. What she really wants is to stay home with her children, but she feels obligated to get a job outside the home. So instead of applying for the perfect position, she applies for jobs that she knows she's not qualified for, or jobs that require hours incompatible with her family's schedule so she has to turn down the job if it's offered. Subconsciously, that's her way of ensuring she won’t have to leave home, and at least she can say she "tried" to get a job.

Those who self-sabotage may also be afraid of what others will think of them should they accomplish their goals. They might not believe they're worthy of the outcome, so they act in ways that will ensure their failure.

These destructive efforts are done subconsciously, so even the saboteurs have fooled themselves into thinking they know what they want. If there is any uncertainty in their mind, any doubt, any fear, they will find a way to make sure it doesn't happen.

Perhaps this describes you? Have you sabotaged yourself in the past? Are you still doing it now? Are you not able to move forward with your goals, no matter how hard you try?

Fortunately we CAN overcome self-sabotage. The most important step to stopping self-sabotaging behavior is to recognize that it's happening. We must develop a conscious awareness of our thoughts, emotions, and actions.

If you've been struggling with a certain goal and things just don't seem to be working out for you, take a look at the setbacks that were encountered and evaluate the situation. Could any of the obstacles have been avoided by making wiser choices on your part? Are there a significantly high number of obstacles that have arisen for this one particular goal? If so, you may be self-sabotaging yourself.

A great way to get in touch with your subconscious mind is by spending time in quiet meditation. Ask yourself what you're afraid of. What fears do you have? What uncertainties? What makes you feel uncomfortable about this goal? For what reasons would you try to hold yourself back? Using a journal to write these questions and answers can help too, because writing can help you to connect with the deepest part of yourself. It might take time and practice, but exploring these possibilities can dramatically help you to get out of the self-sabotage rut.

When we finally understand that we are in control of our own success, we will be set free from all limitations! By developing clarity and insight about the outcomes we want to create, and the awareness for potential setbacks, we can stop the self-sabotage and focus our energies on working toward new goals that we will fully support in every way. We will then look back one day and see that instead of being our own worst saboteur, we have become our best supporter.

By: Wendy Betterini

Source: http://www.articledashboard.com

Wendy Betterini is a freelance writer who strives to motivate, uplift, and inspire you to make your dreams a reality. Visit her website, www.WingsForTheHeart.com for more positive thoughts to help you on your journey.


Goal Setting, Personal Planning and Success – How to set very SMART goals!

Goal setting, is a skill that you have to learn if you want success. Goal setting, personal planning and action are key elements in your success. Goal setting is so important that there has been a lot written on this topic.

The biggest challenge is setting goals and then going on to achieve them. If you can set goals according to your personal plan and you can get into the habit of achieving them you will have success. However many people fail to follow through on their goals.

The secret is to use a simple, basic process for setting your goals and make sure that you have some means of achieving them, without making them so easy that they don’t really stretch you.

The four keys to success in Goal setting

There are four main elements to a good goal, encompassed in the acronym S.M.A.R.T. This stands for:

Specific – your goals should be specific, as specific as you can make them. The more specific they are the easier it will be for you to know when you’ve achieved them and to measure your progress towards achieving them. Rather than say “I want to make a lot of money” a good goal would say “I want an income of $5000 per month by October 1st 2006”. Can you see the difference.

You might hesitate to be specific because you might not know what you can achieve – pick a number that seems exciting but not completely insane and go with it.

Measurable Make sure you can measure your goal – if you can’t measure it, how will you know you’ve got it? “I want an income of $5000 per month by October 1st 2006” fits the bill nicely!

You may want to set a goal in some other area of your life where the measurement may be more difficult – e.g. you may want to improve your relationship with your spouse or your boss. Think about how you’re going to know when you’re there – will it mean no more rows, will it mean something else like you eat out together once a week? Think of something that is going to be evidence of achieving your goal.

Realistic This is a tricky one – you have to balance the need for your goal to be achievable with the need for your goal to stretch you. Goals that do not stretch you simply won’t inspire you – would you really get excited about doing your weekly grocery shop 1 day earlier? On the other hand setting a goal to be 10 feet tall is just not going to happen unless you end up in a delusional state!

You will need to use your own judgement here. You will also need to practise the art of goal setting – as you set goals more often in a particular area, you are going to get better at judging what’s achievable but realistic for you. Accept that you may need to learn by trail and error at first.

Time-bound You’ve got to know when you want your goal to be finished. Our money example does this very well. The object of setting goals is to move your forward in your life, this has to happen by a certain time or you will die before you get there. Your goals simply must be time-bound. Choosing the time frame can make the difference between a realistic and an unrealistic goal (doubling your income next week might be a bit difficult, over 5 years it should be easily achievable).

Be SMART when you are setting your goals and take the actions you need to achieve them and you will be well on the road to success.

Do you want to know more about goal personal planning setting success ?


About the Author: You can get a free e-course The success principle . Visit my website for more resources, articles, and support materials about success and personal growth here.

Kevin John has spent many years helping businesses owners, aspiring business owners, and private individuals to develop the understanding and skills needed to achieve the success that they want.

Source: http://www.easyarticles.com


Developing Self Esteem During Childhood

The building of self-esteem starts in childhood. This means that as parents you have a responsibility to help your son or daughter to have a healthy self-image of him or herself. A healthy self-image is the cornerstone of good self-esteem.

How important is self-esteem in a child's development? Developing self-esteem during childhood is very crucial. This is because it could affect the child in every stages of his or her development. How he looks at him or herself will definitely affect his or her future relationships, career development, confidence, prosperity and even happiness. Studies have shown that one of the traits happy people share is having a positive self-image of themselves.

How does a parent that his or her child has a healthy self-image? There are several ways to do this. Below are just some of the things you can do to develop your child's self-esteem.

Never compare your child with other children

The single most devastating thing a parent can do to ruin his or her child's self-esteem is to compare him or her with other children. Unfortunately, comparisons are very much a part of our culture particularly our schooling system. One of the ways a child gets compared to other children is through peer pressure.

Every child knows that there is tremendous pressure from other children, particularly from the ones in school to conform to the ways of a certain group. That is why in school you can see several cliques and these groups can be identified with different labels. There are the jocks, the jerks, the nerd or geek, the addict, the slut, etc. These groups are inherently not bad but oftentimes group's identity precedes the individual's identity which could lead into a loss in identity and eventually low self-esteem.

To most adults these are just groups and labels but for a young innocent child the cliques are their world. Your child intentionally or not gets labeled and his or her tendency to is group with the ones with similar ideas and interests.

Always praise and encourage your children

When you talk to your child, always remember to use positive and encouraging words. If your child has done something praiseworthy then do not hold back on the kind and beautiful words. Doing so will do wonders for your kid's self esteem. It does not matter whether the act is big or small. If he did something good then praise him for it. There is nothing more discouraging than the feeling of not being appreciated for the things that you have done.

Praising and encouraging children provides them with a positive self image of themselves. For them, it means that they are important enough for you to notice and recognize their achievements in life.

By constantly giving kind encouraging words to children, you can ensure that they will grow healthy psychologically.

Of course if they did something wrong, children should be reprimanded. But should do it in a way that it won't hurt their ego and damage their esteem. Whenever they have done something that is less than d desirable always make it clear to them that you are not in favor with the deed and not with them.

Remember, developing your child's self-esteem is very important in his or her progress. Just follow the guidelines to make sure that your kid will grow up mature emotionally and mentally.


Happiness - 13 Steps To Maximum Happiness!

1. Set a goal and achieve it:

By setting a desired end in mind, it allows one to be able to concentrate fully on achieving the goal. When one goes through the process of gaining his/her targets, the person becomes satisfied and happy. It is a great feeling.

2. Smile everyday:

Having a smile on the face and trying to be angry is difficult. By smiling, it influences our state of mind. It makes one feel good and others who seen the smile feel good as well.

3. Positive mindset and attitude:

What we focus, expands. Same goes with our attitude and perception in things. Adopt a positive mindset and look at the ‘good’ things. With a positive attitude, makes the best out of everything, don’t focus on the can’ts, focus on the cans. You be happier that way.

4. Relax and enjoy life:

Life is hectic and fast paced in this modernize era. We need to learn and take time out to adore ourselves. Meanwhile, learn to enjoy life and have fun at the same time. Relax our mind give us a enjoyable feeling.

5. Do what you love:

We always have something that we love to do and whenever we are able to do it, we feel great. However, sometime, it is difficult to pursue the things that we enjoy, but we can learn to love the things we do and be happy.

6. Be your true self:

Stop putting a mask on your face when you walk out of the house, it’s tiring. Be true to your inner heart. Buy things that you really like but do not overspend. Learn to accept things as some are not within our control.

7. Be a student and learn new things:

The world is our teacher and everyone around us will be giving us lessons in some ways or another. Have a learning heart and learn from failures/mistakes and your life will be better and happier.

8. Giving:

The ability to give is a great feeling. When we have the luxury of giving others who are less fortunate, we feel happy as we are helping them.

9. Healthy lifestyle:

Health is very important on our life. Having a healthy lifestyle is a perfect platform to build our happiness. Without health, is almost impossible to be really happy.

10. Wish the best for others and mean it:

Don’t be selfish and only care for yourself. Wishing the best for others and they will in turn wish the best for you. You feel better and happy for them too.

11. Self control:

Discipline is needed if you want to achieve something; it is the same case for having happiness. There are some must dos and some must not. We need to self control in order to complete the task.

12. Appreciate the world:

Thank God in whichever religion you are faithful in. Life is short and we must learn to appreciate the world. Blaming others do not make us happier.

13. Good friends and companion:

With good friends and a good relationship, you should be happy!

By: Jackson Tan

Source: http://www.articledashboard.com

Jackson Tan is an University student who wants to promote and spreads the word of HAPPINESS to the whole world. He believes that everyone can be Happy as long as they choose to. For more free information on Happiness, go to projecth.blogspot.com/ This article is free for republishing by visitors provided the resource link is retained.


Self improvement and success go hand in hand

How do you know if a person is willing to attain self improvement? This is a question with no definite answer. It will all depend on the individual.

Many people have goals, dreams or ambitions but do not know how to go about achieving them. They may have thought about what would make up self improvement and their ideal life, but have no idea how to even begin to make the plans and take the actions required to make them a reality.

Some people have a vague idea on how to go about self improvement. These are the ones that believe that if only they had a better job, or had been given better opportunities, or met the love of their life, or whatever else, everything would be fine and they would be happy.

They feel that their happiness or lack of happiness is decided by external factors and their thoughts and actions are of little consequence.

Some believe that if only they had more money they could have whatever they want and be on their way to self improvement.

They may have spent little time thinking about what they actually want from life, and do not really believe there is anything they can do to create their fuzzy version of utopia anyway, apart from buying more lottery tickets.

Other people do not even know what they actually want from their lives and may even have little idea what would really makes them happy. They seem to just drift from day to day, week to week, month to month, and year to year, and do little more than just about get by.

They may have seemingly secure jobs and be earning enough to live relatively comfortable lives. They seem happy enough and have no great ambition to achieve anything more from their lives than they currently have.

Is self improvement important?

The reality is that throughout our lives we are all constantly growing and developing. Circumstances make us grow and develop, even if we do not make the conscious decision to do so.

Up to a certain age, we learn through formal education and we continue to learn through our experiences for the rest of our lives. We have to learn and grow to deal with everything that life throws at us. We all have to go through self improvement.

Modern life moves at a dramatically faster pace than at anytime in history. For anyone living in modern society there are more opportunities to do anything that you want to do with your life than ever before.

But there is also more competition than ever before, and ever changing technology means that there really are few, if any ‘jobs for life’ anymore. It is now normal not only to change jobs quite often throughout our working lives, but even to completely change careers and industries.

Because the workplace is so competitive, people who are ambitious and hungry for success know they need to learn new skills and knowledge to keep ahead of the pack. To attain this, self improvement is needed.

These are the people that will be most likely to keep their jobs, or progress within their chosen field, or that will be readily employable in different organizations or industries.

A commitment to self improvement and personal growth may well be the deciding factor in how anyone’s future will turn out.


13 “FAB” Tips To Go From Whiner To A Winner

1. Center Yourself.

Take in a deep breath. Let it out. Now, breathe in brilliance. Exhale out the burden. Do this three times so you feel more centered.

2. Ask for the Greatest Good.

As Mayor, take a moment and claim your office, and ask that your solutions be for the highest good for all.

3. Set Your Intention.

Set your intention to discover successful scenarios.

4. What Do You Want?

Take a moment to think of something fabulous you'd like to do, be, or have.

5. See It.

Let's say you want to double your income. Picture yourself enjoying the fun and freedom all that dough will give you.

6. Listen Up.

What goes on in your brain when you see yourself in those pictures? Do you hear all the reasons it won't happen? "It's impossible." "I can't make more money." "I got fired from my last job." "I'm not smart enough." Okey-dokey. Thank your Criticism Committee for showing up.

7. Make a Shift.

As Mayor, you are the one in charge of what you tell yourself. You can switch your self-talk.

8. Quick, a Pic.

Think of a way to make $1. Great. Now, think of an idea for making $100. Super. Now, think of an idea that will make $1,000. Excellent. Now, have a million-dollar idea. $1,000.000. Well done! (Every hairbrained concept counts!)

Did you notice how you had different pictures for each?

9. Brainstorming.

Now, instruct your Mental Board to brainstorm solutions—how to manifest the picture of what you want. The best way to come up with a few really good ideas is to start with lots of ideas. They don't have to be good. They don't have to work. They don't even need to make a lot of sense. Just create a downpour of possibilities.

10. Write Them Down.

Jot down your Solution Solutions as they come to you (no editing or peeking from the Criticism Committee, please).

11. Review.

Once you have ten ideas (silly, stupid, and impossible ones count) reevaluate your list. Is there an approach you hadn't thought of? Is there a next step you can explore? Bravo! If not, that's fine too. You can keep playing the game to find the solution, instead of looking at the problem.

12. What You Focus on Grows.

Stay focused on what you want more of and how you can create it.

13. Thank Yourself.

Thank yourself for making a choice to discover the power of positive focus.


About the Author: Eli Davidson built a design company from $17 and a glue gun to 1.5 million in sales in four years. In an 18 month period she lost her business, marriage and health leaving her $88,000 in debt. That was in 1999. Using the system she teaches, she turned her life around. Four years later she had paid off her debt, was living in a million dollar home, and coaching some of the most successful people in America including Emmy, Grammy and Golden Globe winners.

Today, she is a nationally recognized woman’s business expert who shares her ‘Turnaround Techniques’ in her new book, Funky to Fabulous. Eli has been featured on ‘The Today Show’, USA Network, NBC and Fox Television. Contact Eli mailto:info@elidavidson.com or at (310) 842.8076.

Source: http://www.easyarticles.com


Some Self Esteem Building Exercises

There are simply times when we feel so bad about ourselves. It can be caused by a lot of things. Heartbreak is one of the most common reasons for low self esteem and is often the case for people who lost their self to their relationship. For the people who are in love with their career, a demotion can kill their self esteem. Workaholics who get fired are the number one candidates of low self esteem.

Teenagers who devote their time and energy to finally getting that slot in the varsity will have a lot to work on their self esteem should they be cut from the team. Self esteem is anchored in a lot of things like the factors mentioned above but solely depending on one single factor is not good. A high self esteem should be gained by being able positive toward all aspects of life and not just one.

In case you are one of those people who are suffering from low self esteem or happen to know someone who is suffering from low self esteem then read on and maybe these exercises can help you in finding your way back to gaining that high self esteem. Let us start off with your self. The mirror can do so many things. How many times have we seen depressed people throw mirrors or throw something at mirrors to break them because they do not like what they see?

Many, many times I would bet. So let us begin with making sure that we like what we see in the mirrors. In this phase, physically looking good is very important so take the time to fix yourself. Take a trip to the parlor or to the gym. It is a must that you like and love what you see in the mirror because such fondness is a good way to start making yourself better. And when that is settled, look at the mirror every morning and say “I love myself” not because your narcissistic but because you love the unique you who have so much to offer to the world.

Have one day of fun with friends every week. Sometimes surrounding yourself with people is not enough. You have to have a day spent with really close friends wherein you do nothing but celebrate the “highs” of the week. Think up of something like the “snap cup” in the movie Legally Blonde and have a session every week.

Why every week? It is nice to always have something to look forward to every week. This exercise, aside from helping you keep your self esteem, will enable you to share a unique bond with your friends and together you will all grow up beautifully. Be careful not to over praise each other so make sure that you only give sincere and timely praises to each other.

Those are just two exercises you can practice to build your self esteem or to finally build a high self esteem. There are other ways but one individual practice and another group exercise should encourage you to get at least get started and then just keep on doing it until it becomes habit. You never know, when you are so good at it then you can begin to walk the talk and inspire others to do the same.


Seven Steps to Designing the Life You Deserve

Feel something’s not right in your life? Feeling stuck? Not sure where you’re headed? Are you simply searching for more?

No need to swim against the current of your life, engulfed in frustration. You can take steps today to release what’s holding you back, reshape the direction of your life and sail forward in an effortless flow.

Here are seven steps to transforming your life by design:

1. Accept yourself and your life as they are now! Where you are in your life today right now is precisely where you are supposed to be. Think about it. Your life is your story and it is meant to inspire others to achieve their own personal greatness. Lovingly embrace yourself and your amazing, unique story with open arms.
2. Be grateful. Express gratitude daily for who you are, what you have, and what you do. Start your day with words of thanksgiving. Share your gratitude for others through your words and actions. Let the people in your life know how important they are to you. Remember: being grateful first is a non-negotiable prerequisite for attracting into your life all that you desire and deserve. So give thanks daily.

3. Name your pain. Identify it. Isolate what has you stuck. What is blocking the flow of your life? Relationship issues? Regrets? Anger? Pluck them from the core of your emotional being. Line them all up on the table. Get ready to face your foes. The key is to be completely honest with yourself.

4. Forgive yourself and others. Thank yourself and the others for giving you such powerful life lessons. The act of forgiving is intended to make you a whole person again regardless of the response of the other person. Forgiveness frees you and allows you to embrace with hope the promises of tomorrow.

5. Release the pain and move on. Journal your feelings. Write letters and tear them up. Scream into your pillow. Most importantly, breath through the pain. Life’s lacerations will always be a part of your story but they need not obstruct you from living the life you so bountifully deserve. Stop being a victim. You have only one precious life to live. Let go of what does not serve you and make the decision to move on now! Strive to thrive.

6. Design what you intend to do with your one life. Visualize the reality you know you deserve. Create your vision board. Fill it with pictures, words, and symbols that draw you forward to fulfill the purpose for which you were created. Give yourself permission to dream and dream big. We are meant to live abundantly!

7. Take action daily. Prioritize your daily activities, focusing on those that move you closer to your goals. Be accountable to yourself and others on a daily basis. A willingly and purposefully set high standards for yourself. Joyfully move forward in the direction of your vision. Savor the fine flavor of inner peace and fulfillment that come from actively working the purpose for which you were created.

So step through what stops you. Walk with a definite purpose and work with a definite purpose, offering hope and inspiration to others through your story of success.

Colorize your life by transforming the basic black and white of everyday living into the vibrant, colorful spectrum of possibilities that awaits you.

Choose to change. Choose to be unstoppable. Choose to live a life brimming with abundance. The choice is yours.

About the Author: Businesswoman, Friend, Collaborator, and Team player, Mary Nerburn fulfills her Entrepreneurial Calling by offering a great service that enriches the lives of others. Together with other fellow BraveHeart Community members, her goal is to empower Women to be multi-dimensional success stories and inspiration to others. Be sure to Visit : Be a BraveHeart Woman

Source: http://www.easyarticles.com


FEAR AND REASON.

"In civilized life it has at last become possible for large numbers of people to pass from the cradle to the grave without ever having had a pang of genuine fear. Many of us need an attack of mental disease to teach us the meaning of the word." William James.

We have all heard the seemingly discriminating remarks that fear is normal and abnormal, and that normal fear is to be regarded as a friend, while abnormal fear should be destroyed as an enemy.

The fact is that no so called normal fear can be named which has not been clearly absent in some people who have had every cause therefor. If you will run over human history in your mind, or look about yea in the present life, you will find here and there persons who, in situations or before objects which ought, as any fearful soul will insist, to inspire the feeling of at least normal self-protecting fear, are nevertheless wholly without the feeling. They possess every feeling and thought demanded except fear. The idea of self-preservation is as strongly present as with the most abjectly timid or terrified, but fear they do not know. This fearless awareness of fear suggesting conditions may be due to several causes. It may result from constitutional make-up, or from long continued training or habituation, or from religious ecstasy, or from a perfectly calm sense of spiritual selfhood which is unhurtable, or from the action of very exalted reason. Whatever the explanation, the fact remains: the very causes which excite fear in most of us, merely appeal, with such people, if at all. to the instinct of self-preservation and to reason, the thought-element of the soul which makes for personal peace and wholeness.

Banish all fear.         

It is on such considerations that I have come to hold that all real fear-feeling should and may be banished from our life, and that what we call "normal fear" should be substituted in our language by "instinct" or by "reason," the element of fear being dropped altogether.

"Everyone can testify that the psychical state called fear consists of mental representations of certain painful results" (James). The mental representations may be very faint as such, but the idea of hurt to self is surely present. If, then, it can be profoundly believed that the real self cannot be hurt; if the reason can be brought to consider vividly and believingly all quieting considerations; if the self can be held consciously in the assurance that the White Life surrounds the true self, and is surely within that self, and will suffer "no evil to come nigh," while all the instincts of self preservation may be perfectly active, fear itself must be removed "as far as the east is from the west."

These are the ways, then, in which any occasion for fear may be divided:

As a warning and as a maker of panic. But let us say that the warning should be understood as given to reason, that fear need not appear at all, and that the panic is perfectly useless pain. With these discriminations in mind, we may now go on to a preliminary study of fear.

preliminary study of fear.              

Fear is (a) an impulse, (b) a habit, (c) a disease.

Fear, as it exists in man, is a make-believe of sanity, a creature of the imagination, a state of insanity.

Furthermore, fear is, now of the nerves, now of the mind, now of the moral consciousness.

The division depends upon the point of view. What is commonly called normal fear should give place to reason, using the word to cover instinct as well as thought. From the correct point of view all fear is an evil so long as entertained.

Whatever its manifestations, wherever its apparent location, fear is a psychic state, of course, reacting upon the individual in several ways: as, in the nerves, in mental moods, in a single impulse, in a chronic habit, in a totally unbalanced condition. The reaction has always a good intention, meaning, in each case, "Take care! Danger!" You will see that this is so if you will look for a moment at three comprehensive kinds of fear fear of self, fear for self, fear for others. Fear of self is indirectly fear for self danger. Fear for others signifies foresensed or forepictured distress to self because of anticipated misfortune to others. I often wonder whether, when we fear for others, it is distress to self or hurt to them that is most emphatically in our thought.

Fear, then, is usually regarded as the soul's danger signal. But the true signal is instinctive and thoughtful reason.

Even instinct and reason, acting as warning, may perform their duty abnormally, or assume abnormal proportions. And then we have the feeling of fear. The normal warning is induced by actual danger apprehended by mind in a state of balance and self-control. Normal mind is always capable of such warning. There are but two ways in which so-called normal fear, acting in the guise of reason, may be annihilated: by the substitution of reason for fear, and by the assurance of the white life.

Let it be understood, now, that by normal fear is here meant normal reason real fear being denied place and function altogether. Then we may say that such action of reason is a benefactor to man. It is, with pain and weariness, the philanthropy of the nature of things within us.

One person said: "Tired? No such word in my house!" Now this cannot be a sound and healthy attitude. Weariness, at a certain stage of effort, is a signal to stop work. When one becomes so absorbed in labor as to lose consciousness of the feeling of weariness, he has issued a "hurry call" on death. I do not deny that the soul may cultivate a sublime sense of buoyancy and power; rather do I urge you to seek that beautiful condition; but I hold that when a belief or a hallucination refuses to permit you to hear the warning of nerves and muscles, Nature will work disaster inevitably. Let us stand for the larger liberty which is joyously free to take advantage of everything Nature may offer for true well-being. There is a partial liberty which tries to realize itself by denying various realities as real; there is a higher liberty which really realizes itself by conceding such realities as real and by using or disusing them as occasion may require in the interest of the self at its best. I hold this to be true wisdom: to take advantage of everything which evidently promises good to the self, without regard to this or that theory, and freely to use all things, material or immaterial, reasonable or spiritual. I embrace your science or your method; but I beg to ignore your bondage to philosophy or to consistency. So I say that to normal health the weary-sense is a rational command to replenish exhausted nerves and muscles.

It is not liberty, it is not healthful, to declare, "There is no pain!" Pain does exist, whatever you affirm, and your affirmation that it does not is proof that it does exist, for why (and how) declare the non-existence of that which actually is non-existent? But if you say, "As a matter of fact I have pain, but I am earnestly striving to ignore it, and to cultivate thought-health so that the cause of pain may be removed," that is sane and beautiful. This is the commendable attitude of the Bible character who cried: "Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief." To undertake swamping pain with a cloud of psychological fog that is to turn anarchist against the good government of Nature. By pain Nature informs the individual that he is somewhere out of order. This warning is normal. The feeling becomes abnormal in the mind when imagination twangs the nerves with reiterated irritation, and Will, confused by the discord and the psychic chaos, cowers and shivers with fear.

I do not say there is no such thing as fear. Fear does exist. But it exists in your life by your permission only, not because it is needful as a warning against "evil."

Fear is induced by unduly magnifying actual danger, or by conjuring up fictitious dangers through excessive and misdirected psychical reactions. This also may be taken as a signal of danger, but it is a falsely-intentioned witness, for it is not needed, is hostile to the individual because it threatens self-control and it absorbs life's forces in useless and destructive work when they ought to be engaged in creating values.


Learn about building high Self-Esteem

Self esteem is something that every person should have and the loss of it in a person spell disaster. Just like anything that a person has to have, a person should work at building his or her self esteem. Before one can do that, there is a need to know things about self esteem. Self esteem is how a person perceives his or herself. There are various factors that a person should have a positive attitude about including the value he or she gives to him or herself as a human being, his or her career and his or her achievements in order to develop a high self esteem.

That is only for starters, one has to go deeper an see a positive meaning to one’s place in the world and as well as one’s purpose in life. In looking at the future, there should be optimism while evaluating one’s potential to be successful by working on one’s weaknesses and highlighting the strengths. Last but certainly not the least a person has to have independence or the capacity to stand on his or her own to feet because being independent is one good way to start building a high self esteem.

Knowing all these things will help a great deal but there might also be other factors that you want to add but this is a really good start already. You might get from the very long first paragraph that building high self esteem is all about the individual and that is true because your self worth is obviously based on how the individual sees his or himself.

However the people surrounding a person also has an impact on the self esteem of the individual concerned especially the people with whom the person has a close relationship with. This is the reason why there are a lot of cases of damaged self esteems that are somehow related to emotional and physical battery as well as milder cases of heartbreaks for the teenagers.

Getting back on your feet has a lot to do with getting that self esteem back after a shattering experience. It does not matter if you work on building it slowly so long as you are focused at getting your high self esteem back to where it belongs.

The importance of high self esteem is one thing that we cannot ignore because it is very crucial as a cornerstone to a happy living. Having a high level of this aspect of yourself will make you highly motivated to work at achieving your goals will give you the right attitude to be successful in whatever endeavor one chooses to take.

In fact in a CNN interview with Robert Wagner by the legend Larry King, he was quoted as saying that “I would tell them the most important thing is to work on your self esteem, that is the best advice I can give.” Take it from someone who knows what he is talking about and to one who walked the talk. So for those who have low self esteem, look within yourselves and discover that there is so much about you that you can be proud of.

For those who are lucky enough to already be working on building high self esteem, keep up with your good work and hopefully nothing will ever crush you should something very challenging come your way.


30 Days To Success: For Big Changes And Small

Changes that can be adopted for 30 days can last a lifetime. But adopting habits or changes for 30 days gives benefits even if the changes are small. These benefits include increased confidence, discipline, and the feelings of success and accomplishment.

For example, stopping smoking for 30 days might be a particularly tough goal for some people -- although, it's certainly easier than imagining yourself quitting forever. (Of course, once you've quit for 30 days, who'd want to start back up?)

On the other hand, paying someone a compliment each day for 30 days is probably a bit easier to handle. It's not as stressful and, to be honest, it could actually be fun. After 30 days, of paying complements you'll probably find that you are more inclined to compliment people in general. As a result you'll likely make friends a bit easier and have more success in any situation where you have to interact with other people. Just because the 30 day goal you set isn't big, that doesn't mean it isn't useful or valuable.

The first 30 day goal I set, for example, was to not drink any alcohol for 30 days. I'd been going through a difficult personal time and had started drinking more than was normal for me. I wasn't having major problems, but still -- I knew I needed to cut back. I'd been telling myself I needed to cut back but I just hadn't been able to get started. The idea of just stopping for 30 days seemed like it wouldn't be too hard. I was able to accomplish this 30 day goal and I felt great -- I felt a real sense of accomplishment! It went quickly and I felt real success!

And I noticed a real impact on my life as well. I wasn't as tired each morning and, as a result, had an easier time getting up to exercise before work. After 30 days I was able to choose whether or not I wanted to go back to drinking (now I occasionally have a glass or two of wine). I feel good about the choices I've made.

Starting with a relatively small goal was the right thing for me. It had immediate positive impacts, plus gave me confidence. It was just what I needed to break my routine and make the changes I wanted.

30 days to success with small things -- or with big things -- is a simple, quick way to grab some immediate success and get immediate results. It's a success plan we can all work with.

Here are some small 30 Days Success Plans you can use to get started.

·         Compliment someone each day for 30 days.

·         Call a friend or family member each day for 30 days

·         Say "I Love You" or give your partner a "good kiss" at least once a day for 30 days

·         Eat vegetables each day

·         Pack a lunch instead of buying lunch

·         Go on a "news fast" and avoid reading newspapers, news websites and or watching TV news

·         Clean or de-clutter one one small area in your home each day

By: Kevin Bedell

Source: http://www.articledashboard.com

Kevin Bedell is a published author, experienced editor and writer, and founder of the '30 Days to Success" website (30days.itious.com).


BUILD YOUR SELF ESTEEM, A STARTER GUIDE TO SELF IMPROVEMENT

So how do you stay calm, composed and maintain self esteem in a tough environment? Here are some tips you may to consider as a starter guide to self improvement.

Imagine yourself as a Dart Board. Everything and everyone else around you may become Dart Pins, at one point or another. These dart pins will destroy your self esteem and pull you down in ways you won’t even remember. Don’t let them destroy you, or get the best of you.  So which dart pins should you avoid?

Dart Pin #1 :

Negative Work Environment

Beware of “dog eat dog” theory where everyone else is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non- appreciative people usually thrive. No one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch and dinner, and stay up late.

Most of the time you get to work too much without getting help from people concerned.  Stay out of this, it will ruin your self esteem. Competition is at stake anywhere. Be healthy enough to compete, but in a healthy competition that is.

Dart Pin #2:

Other People’s Behavior

Bulldozers, brown nosers, gossipmongers, whiners, backstabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, exploders, patronizers, sluffers… all these kinds of people will pose bad vibes for your self esteem, as well as to your self improvement scheme.

Dart Pin #3:

Changing Environment

You can’t be a green bug on a brown field. Changes challenge our paradigms. It tests our flexibility, adaptability and alters the way we think. Changes will make life difficult for awhile, it may cause stress but it will help us find ways to improve our selves. Change will be there forever, we must be susceptible to it.

Dart Pin #4:

Past Experience

It’s okay to cry and say “ouch!” when we experience pain. But don’t let pain transform itself into fear. It might grab you by the tail and swing you around. Treat each failure and mistake as a lesson.

Dart Pin #5:

Negative World View

Look at what you’re looking at. Don’t wrap yourself up with all the negativities of the world. In building self esteem, we must learn how to make the best out of worst situations.

Dart Pin #6:

Determination Theory

The way you are and your behavioral traits is said to be a mixed end product of your inherited traits (genetics), your upbringing (psychic), and your environmental surroundings such as your spouse, the company, the economy or your circle of friends. You have your own identity. If your father is a failure, it doesn’t mean you have to be a failure too. Learn from other people’s experience, so you’ll never have to encounter the same mistakes.

Sometimes, you may want to wonder if some people are born leaders or positive thinkers.

NO. Being positive, and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing lines for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent. God wouldn’t come down from heaven and tell you –

“George, you may now have the permission to build self esteem and improve your self.”  

In life, its hard to stay tough specially when things and people around you keep pulling you down. When we get to the battle field, we should choose the right luggage to bring and armors to use, and pick those that are bullet proof. Life’s options give us arrays of more options. Along the battle, we will get hit and bruised.

And wearing a bullet proof armor ideally means ‘self change’. The kind of change which comes from within. Voluntarily. Armor or Self Change  changes 3 things: our attitude, our behavior and our way of thinking.

Building self esteem will eventually lead to self improvement if we start to become responsible for who we are, what we have and what we do. Its like a flame that should gradually spread like a brush fire from inside and out. When we develop self esteem, we take control of our mission, values and discipline.  Self esteem brings about self improvement, true assessment, and determination. So how do you start putting up the building blocks of self esteem? Be positive. Be contented and happy. Be appreciative. Never miss an opportunity to compliment. A positive way of living will help you build self esteem, your starter guide to self improvement.


How to Conquer Your Fears

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by fear - so much so that it prevented you from doing something you wanted to do?  Believe it or not, this is a common problem faced by many people daily.

Fear has the power to hold you back from taking risks, following your dreams, or becoming successful at anything you attempt to do.  If you allow it to control you for long enough, it can eventually erode your quality of life and keep you locked in a prison of inactivity.

What many people fail to realize is that fear is nothing more than a conditioned response.  It's a natural reaction to a frightening or unfamiliar situation.  While it is usually automatic, there are things you can do to overcome it.

1)  Check your expectations.

One major contributor of fear is the prevalence of negative expectations.  Do you usually find yourself expecting the worst in every situation?  Do you worry obsessively about what could go wrong, rather than focusing on your strengths and capabilities?

If you make a conscious effort to expect the best, see the positive side of each situation and keep reminding yourself that you can handle more than you often think, you'll find yourself with much less fear to deal with.  Even if feelings of fear do manage to creep into your consciousness, you'll still be able to keep them in perspective and balance them against an underlying sense of confidence.

2)  Discredit your fears.

Experts will tell you that the majority of things you fear will never come to pass anyway.  While this may be true, it sure doesn't feel that way when fear has a chokehold on you!  However, if you look a little more closely at your fears when they arise, you may be able to dismiss at least a few.

For example, if you have a fear of public speaking and your boss wants you to give a presentation at work, you might feel like your life (and perhaps your livelihood) is on the line.  You may fear getting fired, or worry that your colleagues will lose respect for you if you don't do a good job.

But is any of this likely to happen?  In most cases, no.  Rather than worrying about what "might" happen if you don't give a solid presentation, you might brainstorm ways to help improve your performance, such as being well prepared, practicing your delivery on friends and family members, writing notes to yourself and so on.

3)  Do the very thing you fear.

When you remember that fear is simply a feeling, it loses much of its power.  It can't harm you and except in truly threatening situations you can choose to ignore it and move forward anyway. 

If you weigh the pros and cons in any situation, you may decide that the possibility of negative consequences is minimal so there's nothing to stop you from ignoring your fear and going for it!  This will be determined by you on a case by case basis, of course.  The point isn't to become reckless with your decision-making but rather to empower yourself to know when a fear is groundless and easily overcome.


Success, Personal Growth – Do You Know The One Thing You Can Rely On To Always Be There?

It is good to have something to rely on, something that is always there in an ever changing world. You can be comfortable knowing that this thing will always remain the same…

What most people are afraid of is that the one thing that you can rely on is…

Change. We are constantly changing beings living in a universe that is constantly changing. You must learn to adapt to this reality and become comfortable with it.

Many people like to build their comfort zones and then stay there. Their comfort zones have clearly defined unchanging boundaries that prescribe the limits of their lives. It’s pleasant and secure to be in one of these comfort zones until…

The company goes bust, an unforeseen event happens, you wake up one day dissatisfied, wondering what’s over the wall outside your comfort zone.

On the other hand successful people openly embrace change, they welcome the personal growth opportunities it brings, they actively step outside their comfort zones, some even live outside their comfort zones.

Which are you?

Change is the universal law

You have to understand that change is the universal law that applies at all levels everywhere. The universe we live in started as a minute speck of super-concentrated matter that exploded into the universe as we know it today (the “big bang”). That universe is in constant change. Scientists have long discounted the notion that the universe is steady and unchanging.

The planet we live on was born 4 billion years ago, it has been changing every since. Life has blossomed on this planet. The records captured in rocks, which themselves are constantly forming and reforming, show that it has developed through an astounding series of changes leading to us…

Even you are not constant. Physically your body is constantly changing, old cells die, new ones are recreated. You are surrounded by billions of people living in an ever evolving network of global societies and cultures.

It’s not surprising that your mind is in constant flux. You are constantly growing and developing, new ideas are becoming embedded, old ideas are being pushed into the dim recesses of your memory banks.

Yet many people actively resist change. They are driven by fear of failure, fear of rejection and other negative emotions. Rejecting change means that they won’t be threatened by the consequences of that change, they won’t have work to integrate the changes into their minds and their lives, they will not fail in a new challenge and so on…

A very few people, the people who are successful and want personal growth, recognise that change is an inevitable feature of everything that surrounds them. They actively embrace change. If you want to share their success, you need to become comfortable with the fact that you will need to mirror the constantly changing nature of the universe that surrounds you.

When you embrace change, you see it as an opportunity to learn new skills, develop new capabilities, to grow as a person and be more successful. Change means that there will be new openings for your talents to create an impact on the world around you.

Even if you try your hardest to stay the same, you are a constantly changing being living in a constantly changing universe. You should embrace change and actively seek out opportunities to step outside your comfort zone. If you learn to adapt to constant change, the inevitable changes that will take place during your lifetime will be less of a threat. Even better, you will be come into contact with and be able to grasp many more opportunities for success and personal growth!

By: Kevin John

Source: http://www.articledashboard.com

Would you like to learn more about success, personal growth? Download my latest e-book here Secrets of a Millionaire Mindset . Kevin John has spent many years helping businesses owners, aspiring business owners, and private individuals to achieve success.


Set Goals for Self-improvement

In order to succeed or accomplish anything in life you must first set goals. It is especially a must for any person interested in self-improvement. With that said, one of the first sets of goals should be on self-improvement.

But remember "What you achieve through the journey of life is not as important as who you become" - Author Unknown.

Go ahead and take the actions and steps necessary to make your goal of self-improvement in some area of your life into a reality. A good example of this is how athletes will compare their current performance to their own previous performances with self-improvement being the number one goal.

Below are six goal-setting actions to help you realize your goals:

1. Begin with short-term goals that will build upon themselves and lead you to long-term ones.

If you have a big task, like becoming debt free, break it into smaller steps which will help you stay focused and on course. You will feel good as you reach each goal, keeping you motivated and ready for the next one.

2. Make sure you really want the goal. It is very important that the goals you choose are yours and not someone else's goals set for you. If deep down you are not committed to the goals, you will only put off achieving it.

3. Share your goals with others. By doing this you will gain support you need from others. Make sure you share with those who will encourage you and not with those who will give you negative feedback.

4. Write down your goals. Create a written statement of goals and sign it. This will reinforce your commitment and give you a map for success. Also, when times get tough you can read your statement to help motivate you.

5. Stay the course and don't give up. There is nothing more satisfying in life then when you complete a goal. Being successful once turns into many. It can become quite additive.

6. Rejoice and celebrate. Take time to savor the moment. You worked hard and found out that by being committed and dedicated your goals were met.

There you have it, six basic steps that will aid you on your journey to successfully obtaining your goals. All though all six steps are important the one that stands out the most is number 1. If you can't break your goal down into bit size portions you will always put it off or procrastinate. And you know what happens when one procrastinates...nothing gets done. Good luck.

Dennis Watson - Just helping others succeed.

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Sail The Seven C's To Arrive At Positive Change

“Here a problem, there a problem, everywhere a problem, problem, oh McDonald had a problem, E, I, E, I, O, OH NO!” The world is full of problems, just ask any cynic. Perhaps, you’re reading this because you want to be a problem solver, or hopefully, you are looking for ideas to serve as a lighthouse to guide you in making a constructive transformation of some sort in the microcosm of your locale, business, place of employment, or even the greater global community. If you are motivated to make a positive difference somehow, someway, you are invited to continue.

Margaret Mead said: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, devoted citizens can change the world; indeed it is the only thing that has.”

Here is the course these citizens have navigated to reach their destination and so can you.

1. Conviction

2. Courage

3. Counsel

4. Craft

5. Cooperation

6. Communication

7. Commitment

We all have at least one problem that we are passionate about solving. This passion is the Conviction. The issue could be an unfair practice at work, increasing productivity, taking care of employee’s interests, or filling a market niche and increasing exposure. There could be a need for a fence around a school campus for child safety or even an absurd zoning regulation that should experience extinction. It might even be a larger task of bringing peace to a civil war. Conviction is always the first and easiest part of the journey. It is also the closest to the harbor of non-involvement.

Courage is the fortitude to step forth and become involved. It also requires that we assess our attributes, attitude, and resources while looking forward at Commitment. The spark of Courage comes from within, but can be fanned into a formidable blaze with the winds of support and fueled with victories. Gain inner strength from meditation on positive words, inspirational experiences, and principles. Courage is the fortress of character that will sustain you through to the success of a positive change.

Counsel, the third “C”, may involve more that just seeking advice from friends or others who have traversed a course similar to your undertaking. The gathering of as much information and ideas as possible is a large ocean of consideration. Here are just a few of its tides. What is the underlying cause? How did the problem arise? What could have prevented it? Who, what, and to what extant are the effects of the condition? Who, what, and to what extant will a solution produce affects? What have been or are the possible obstacles? What may be the physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and financial expenses and liabilities? What are the rights and responsibilities of all involved? Who will be responsible for maintenance of the solution? The process of Counseling may necessitate the services of an attorney to look at the legal issues, required paperwork, and ramifications. Keep in mind that it’s a mathematical certainty, the more data collected, the greater the possibilities for the next “C”.

Once you’ve spent an impressive tour in the waters of Counsel, Craft a map of creative solutions. Transcribe in detail the prospective routes. This will be beneficial through the remaining “C’s”. You’ll need to draft blueprints to pass the doldrums of apathy and indifference, as well as, strategies to affront the hurricanes of skepticisms and tsunamis of intolerance.

Next, network Cooperation from as many individuals, organizations, and businesses as you can that may possibly have a stake in the outcome of the resolved problem. There have been volumes written on techniques for networking, particularly in the realm of business. If you are not familiar with recent discussion on this topic, take the time and effort to do so. Within this “C” you may also need to allocate responsibility.

Communicate the objectives, articulate ideas, impart information, share feelings and feedback. This must be a multi-directional, fluid process throughout your network. Communication should be a haven where each feels safe from storms of emotions and treacherous reefs of self-centeredness. Communication needs inlets of openness where all the shipmates are respected. Locate the placid bays where tacit whispers of ideas can be heard, for here may be found a treasure chest of possibilities. How this “C” is crossed determines the success or failure of the voyage.

Commitment can be the most arduous “C” to navigate. It may entail a return to one or more of the previous “C’s” for continued buoyancy and not sinking from the onslaught of the monsters of doubt and new problems that have surfaced. You may come across false successes as Sirens alluring you from the true goals. Undoubtedly, you will also experience the icebergs of setback, threatening to put a tragic end to your gallant journey. Consequently, select a theme, adopt a saying